if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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