...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Randomize
