Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
it glows. i had to have it.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Can I color on your dick again?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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