Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize