Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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