i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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