I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
