everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize