someone get that fucking seahorse.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
