Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
