No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize