Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
