He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I was not drunk enough for that final.
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