I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
