I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
