There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Vodka?
Forever.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
