New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
