She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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