call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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