Porn is love you can see.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
