and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
