wat bout pragnant strippers??
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize