woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
