Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
