Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
