Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Randomize
