small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
