im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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