There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
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In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
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Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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