Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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