Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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