Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Girls should come with a carfax report
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
