fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
