Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
