i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize