Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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