I CAN MOONWALK!
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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