ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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