Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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