i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
