im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
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