forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Someone signed my nipple.
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