happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
