I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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