coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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