Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
