Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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