I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
