Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
