let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
